Mardens Journal

i cant believe this account is still active... holy shit!

im an ass, but we all know that

Friday is my last day here @ work... then im fired... but i already have a new job @ the WWW (wrestling school) so its ok! i have to leave here cause he cant afford to pay me anymore. but i get to work/hang out at the WWW all the time now!!!

HalloSlam!!!!(like it i cam eup with it) comming to the fair grounds the weekend b4 halloween Im not sure whos gonna be there but its gonna kick alot of ass!!! hopefully there will be live bands there too... oh and if ur bothing to even read this i expect you to be there lol... hopefully someone wont cry during my match... lol j/k.... kinda :-P kayla and the person know what im talking about lol

Well... I have done a ton of thinking over the last few weeks... i know what im going to do, but i know it will not work, but i'm going to do it anyway. But since i see rejection comming, im probably going to need someone to talk to tonight...

Well I start Pro-wrestling training next week... This should be awesome!!! the 1500 dollar bill isnt but everything else is... If youre reading this... you will soo know a real pro wrestler :-D

Hey guys! if you didnt know I got a car. Its a 89 honda CRX. Its bitchen, and getting better and better all the time. Its lime green with black inside. I want to make it green purple and black :)
here are some pics: if i get it right





or go to www.myspace.com/bryanscrx and Add it :)

btw: its only a 2 seater, and front wheel drive...

but i love it

I also love my babie girl cece, who hopefully loves my car :-P

I am sure you all heard i was in the hospital the other day. Im fine now. But i went to the docrotrs office today... I learned a few things 1. He is fucking weird. 2. I need to do something about my health! But I am already.
I am also doing something about my life too. Got a job, got some money... Now what? Well, I just opened a cheching account, and bought Cece and I cell phones. Now after Her b-day (4/29), and mine (5/5) are over I will be looking for a car. I just want a little 1000 dollar go there and back car. Hopefully I can get one, so im not spending alot on a car. Cause there will be a huge MOVE towards the end of summer if everything goes right ;)

later

I just bought cece and i cell phones. Its a family plan so we can talk when ever for free! I hope i didnt make a mistake though...

If you want my # just ask...

Hey everyoone Im looking to get a notebook, I need everyone's suggestions. I am going to mainly be useing Adobe Creative Suite CS2 on it, but I also want to be able to watch videos, listen to music, and use the internet on it...NOT WIRELESS. Why not? very un-secure. I dont mind plugging in to my modem here... But if you guys can help thanks :)

Job is fucking awesome!!!!!

I think Cece's a lil pissed @ me but w/e She'll get over it. I think because she is with all her drama friends, im not cool enough to talk to her for now... w/e lol.

I am also going to be looking in to buying my first car, after i get this notebook!

something FAST, and i could get in trouble with ;)

hehehe

I got the Dredg Cd today... nope dont like it... yep imma dumbass. Anyone like them? I wanna sell it.

Oh... Cece and I are doing good.

Job if FUCKING AWESOME!!!!

Watch for B.A.M (Bryan's Awesome Magizine) to be out and about.

Ok... I've been working 3 days now. I love it. 8 hs. the frist day, 8 1/2 hours the next 2, at 7 bucks an hour... not bad.... I love the job itself too. But there is onething keeping me from being really happy. Cece... I dont know why, but i have this feeling she wants to leave me. She is talking to random guys, any of wich she could leave me for, and i dont see y not. I guess i dont make her happy any more. what ever i do i get yelled at for. Im afraid to say i love you to her cause she might yell @ me for that... I am probablly getting old to her too. We've been together for a long time now, and im her "first real boyfriend" so im sure she is getting tired of me, and probabbly wants someone new. I know she finds these other guys more attractive than me too. Cause what isnt right? So i dont know anymore, I feel like i should get ready for her to leave me soon. I hope that doesnt happen, I donk know what i'd do.... serioiusly, I wouldnt have a reason to do anything anymore... no reason to work, no reason to get up in the morning, no reason to do anything... If anyone can help... please please do....

Well, I start work monday @ 10, and I FUCKING LOVE CECILIA!!!!!!!!

Well, I ordered my lacrosse stuff, it will be here tomorrow or the next day. I am so happy! Cece and I havent been too happy with each other lately though :( That upsets me. But I think Things are fine now. It seems when we get tired we argue... ok nvm, she just yelled at me again... It hurts so much... Im going now, I dont feel like doing this or anything now...

Ok So going with the theme of LaX (lacrosse) I made two more sticks... better... But I am ordering one soon i think, but cece said she was gonna get me one. I am not sure why. Something about her wanting me to play LAX. But Im going to try to make more sticks todaay, and Im going to make a lax net. I am also going to fix the 2 from before.

Oh if anyone knows the number to that alpha digi design (or w/e its called) can you give it to me. It s that place Sams dad owns or w/e.

I still miss cece, but things are going good. HOpefully we get to see each other saturday.

Oh and i have new myspace pics.... ceces orders

well im gonna get to work.

thanks for reading

Ok so for all of you who saw my other Post. I made lacrosse sticks. I only made two cause they were not that easy. But I took them to lances, erics, and chris's. Everyone got to try them out and got so pissed cause they couldnt do it right. But... After eaach person had them for 5 mins. or so and i took a pass straight to the area you dont want to take a pass to. Everyone seemed to be catching on. Then everyone was like "Hey when we are in a possition where we cant play hockey... Lets play lacrosse" Which is what i wanted to do. Then we all Desided that I am the lacrosse team captain, And we are still the Razorbacks, and always will be the razorbacks when we play any sport. But Now it is up to us to buy real lacrosse sticks. Everyone else ended up making on or hade me make one for them this weekend, and we tried to play. I am actually going to make more today, hopefully three.

I miss Cece. I havent got to really talk to her in a while. She hasnt called me in about a week. Its been me calling her and she is always busy when i do so we cant really talk. I have a bad felling she is going to leave me soon. She doesnt need me. She has enough going on in her life, enough ppl in her life, im just in her way, and am old to her. I feel like i dont matter. She will tell me i do, but i think its just to shut me up. But I guess im over reacting like i always do...

Yester day was fuckers (my dad) birthday. THat means next month is aprils and then Ceces, and in may mine... SO here comes extream depression.... Some of you may know why.

thanks for reading...

Things to do today:

1. Make Lacrosse stick (ghetto one to see if i like playing or not)

2. Get hockey stuff together

3. Call Afinishthatoff and have him come get me.

4. Put shots on him with cody

5. Go to Erics house with everyone.

6. Excape my dad by number 3 on.

7. Finally have fun.

well, today was a lil weird. Lance was over from the night before (when we left to play hockey @ 9:15 at night which was awesome)and like cece called me @ 8 am to tell me she was sick, and damn is she sick:(. But i had to go to movie gallery to check on a job, and my mom wanted to stop abunch of other places, so i ended up leaving lance alone here for hours, i felt bad though. but we came back me and him watched wrestlemania XX and then he left. My brother came home and we played hockey, and now im pretty much here, very uneventful. I did stop by to check on cece though... Oh and jeannie call me today, im kinda worried about her.

So today is vday. this is how it went, All day long i cleaned, watched hockey, and played a little in the kitchen, working on puck control. I ended up doing a sort of very ungraceful split. It hurt, but i kept going cause.... well im dumb. Cece came over, and i made her watch the last 15 mins of the US VS Finland womens hockey game which the US won 7-3 i think. I was happy. But then we went to my room where i turned all my drums faceing straight up, coved with a camo blanket she wanted. on each drum i had something different. on one there was a heart box with reeses and a musical rose. On another a basket filled with rose pedals, a silver bracelet, reeses hearts, and skittles. Then on another one there was doritos with coke (her favorite) and hanging above that was a thingy i made ithe stars with our names and other things burned in to them. And on all of this had rose pedals sprinkled oll over it. but there was one empty drum, because it didnt get here in time, but i got it later for her. It was a big bear holding a big vase of 1/2 dozen (i think) pink roses. She liked everything, and stuff, but was upset we werent going put anywhere. so i reached down and on the seat i had a menu to dans clam stand. Not romantic i know,but the only place i could get to. WE figured out what we were gonna get and left a little later for dinner. It was nice, we were the onlly ones in there for a while. then we came home, hung out for a bit, and we brought her home. I think it was a good vday for us.

On the other hand though, one of my good friend's b/f broke up with her today... yep that was a bastardly thing to do. But she is my tough lil midget, she can handle it.

But on other notes, lance is comming over tomorrow night, staying till thursday, then im going to the showcase thingy for drama on friday, then wrestling on saturday. and cleaning in between everything.

welp thats about it, i'll probably update again soon.

Well, today, im sick.. It sucks... I dont know why im sick, but i am. I just had some soup... not helping. I had some antibiotic called in, hopefully i get it tonight. and i will feel better.

Im watching the NLL, The national lacross league. Its kinda neat. But i still like hockey and wrestling better.

well i dont feel like typing anymore, so im gonna go lay down now.

Well im still looking for a job. If anyone can help plz do. Im seriously getting upset over it.

but anyway.... Lance came over again. He sold my brother like 9 wrestling action figures and a ring and a bunch of other shit for them for $10. That was cool. I remeber we use to play with them all the time. Actually we did for probably too lon but w/e. We are still kids. I swear we will never ever grow up. Fuck that.


I am working on a V-day list for cece. Im still not sure what im going to do for her, I know what im getting her though... well a few things. But i really need idaes of things to do. Anyone wanna give me ideas. I have already cooked her dinner 2 years in a row, I need something special. Something as special as she is. If anyone has suggestions plz let me know.